God > anxiety

This is our weekend before school begins. We have the obligatory before-school-starts haircut scheduled for today. School supplies are ready to be loaded into the backpack. Camera is ready for that ever-dreaded first day of school picture. We're all set, right? Well....

I'm already missing my Jacob. This is the first summer EVER since he's been in school that I've worked part time. We've been together pretty much every Monday and Friday of the last three months. Ya'll pray for me Monday. I have this feeling in the pit of my stomach that it's gonna be as bad as that first day of kindergarten...the brave face at school, but tears all the way home (me, not Jake!). My child is growing up - 7th grade already. Only six more first days of school. More and more I hurt as much as I love that he's growing up. I am so proud of the young man he's becoming - that's the love part. I am also realizing that the years are going by so much more quickly and that before I know it he'll be picking a college or branch of the military to go into - that's the hurt part.

God has shown me that since my mom died I have grown increasingly afraid of losing Jim or Jake. I know that He will take care of them, but I still have moments of gripping fear. Just like with Mom, I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that, should something happen, they'll be with the Lord - but they will be gone from me. I know it's a selfish thought, because being with Him is our ultimate place to be. So, what do I do? I cling to Him, trust Him, believe Him. Psalm 94:19 tells us "In the multitude of my anxious thoughts within me, Your comforts cheer and delight my soul!" That's the verse I'm claiming when anxiety and fear try to grasp hold of me. Satan knows my weak spots - however, I have God's Word as my ammunition against him. As a child of God, anxiety has no place in our lives. Even though it may show up sometimes, God is stronger than it...never forget.